This blog is intended to help and bring insight to people. Please feel free to share this with others. It’s not a platform for shaming, embarrassing, or calling anyone out. Any comments of that nature will be deleted.
While it is addressed to the men, women are welcome to read, comment, and share, especially since their perspective would be quite valuable.
I’ve been writing a short series on How to Get the Girl. Here’s a summary of the articles so far in (you guessed it!) TABLE FORM!
Today, I’m taking the break from theory to bring us some real life examples of men who did these principles and see where they ended up now. As you’ll see from their stories, it’s not about having all the money, it’s not about being Mr. Suave, it’s not about huge, expensive gestures.
Instead, it’s about loving leadership that takes the risk and leads.
Gutch and Rory (Gutch’s version of the events)
From the moment I knew I had romantic intentions for Ror, I made it a point to be honest….
With this in mind, my first step was to declare where I wanted to go with our friendship or in other words – declaring my intent to pursue her. It’s never an easy thing to do, some men stumble through scripted words, some blank out, some sweat blood through their eyes.
I spoke her with a calm, straight face, with my balls choking my throat and with a heart rate above fat burning zone. But I wasn’t about to change my mind, I wasn’t going to play it safe and I was determined that this was worth the risk….
So I said:
“I like you and I want to pursue you.”
Nine simple words that took all the willpower out of my system to say. Nine simple words that no amount of gym time could prepare me for.
To which she replied “WHUT.” How romantic.
Read the rest in Gutch’s blog here where he explains the courage necessary to speak your heart.
Owie and I met at my cousin’s 18th party. I was hosting the event and he was one of the guests. My only interaction with him was when I was asking him to participate in a game, which he declined.
He eventually added me up on FB. A month after we saw each other in Galleria, he chanced upon me on FB and started chatting me up….
He started by saying ‘You’re the host at the party, right?’ I said yes and then all of a sudden he was inviting for coffee so I’d have friends in church.
Never really dated any Christian though I grew up in church, so my idea is just that any guy who asks me out has a hidden agenda.
since I just broke up with my ex, my next reply na was bluntly telling him off na I’m not interested to meet new people coz I just got out of a relationship etc etc
to which he replied ‘feelingera mo naman’…. so I guess I was assuming early on BUT my instinct was right anyway 😉
The whole time, makulit si Owie na sagutin na siya etc. Makulit talaga siya. But I appreciated that he asked permission from my mom coz my family was being over protective of me that time.
Check out April’s writings here. Look for her funny series of Owie Notes.
Bens and Janette (Bens’ words)
The night I first told my wife, Janette, that I liked her was pretty awkward. We had been going out for a while as friends, but I wasn’t sure how or when I should take our friendship further. On this particular evening, a friend was in need of encouragement about the woman he was pursuing…. I gave him advice about not giving up his pursuit for the woman he felt God had chosen for him, even if times felt uncertain.
I suddenly realized that the advice I gave him did not just apply to him, but to me, as well. While I drove Janette home, I felt this was the time for me to confess that I liked her.
But when I began to speak, the only things that came out of my mouth were nervous stutters and scared, deep breathing. I started with, “Um… Okay… Wooh! Ahh…. Phew! Ok…um… It’s probably obvious, but… Okay, I’m just going to say it…” Then finally, I said the things I had been planning on saying in the first place.
I was just amazed because after I told her I liked her, she said that her devotional that morning was about Moses and the burning bush and that she should expect God to reveal something that day, which I guess turned out to be my awkward revelation. A few months after that, I was able to muster the courage again to properly tell her my intentions of marrying her.
Looking back, it could have gone a better way. It certainly wasn’t romantic or creative at the least. It was simply a nervous guy’s confession that didn’t expect a yes or even a no. I just felt I owed it to Janette so I would be clear to her and I owed it to myself to take this step of faith.
I invited her for a birthday dinner with some friends so she wouldnt have any suspicion hehe. When dinner was over, I told my friends to leave (pre planned) and we started walking around the mall where I rambled over and over, basically it took me about 10 minutes before I could really say what I wanted, which is that I like her and I wanted to court her.
As we can see, each of these cases have their humorous embarrassing, off-beat, and unexpected turns. But all of them have resulted in beautiful, thriving relationships now. It’s not about perfection. It’s about a love that pursues perfection while covering imperfections.
I’ve heard rumors about another blogger who is imitating my series with his own posts on How to Get the Girl. If you want to see his stuff, click here. I think his post for today should be called How to Get the Girl: Real Life Scholar’s Version.